Why Successful Potty Training Starts Way Before the First Flush

Jun 25

Written By Kim Rosales | Certified Gentle Potty Coach | Certified Pediatric Sleep Consultant

For many parents, the words “potty training” spark equal parts excitement and dread. It marks a major milestone, but also feels like stepping into the unknown. Maybe you’ve been told, “Just pick a weekend and go all in!” Or maybe you’ve tried and ended up with tears, power struggles, and… carpet cleaner.

The truth? Potty training isn’t something that magically happens in a weekend. In fact, the most successful and stress-free experiences start months before you ever ditch the diapers.

Let’s talk about why preparation is everything, and how starting early can make potty training smoother for both you and your toddler.

1. Toddlers Need Time to Process Change

Potty training is one of the first major life transitions a toddler will go through. It affects their body, their routine, and their sense of independence. Expecting them to go from “diapers forever” to “underwear by Monday” is a big leap—not just physically, but emotionally and cognitively.

By starting gentle potty training preparation months in advance, you give your child time to:

Understand the concept of using the toilet
Develop body awareness
Build confidence and reduce fear
Explore toileting at their own pace without pressure

Many toddlers need repeated, low-pressure exposure before something clicks. You might start with simply inviting your child to sit on the potty seat before bath time, or narrating a diaper change by saying, “Your body made pee! Someday soon, it will go in the potty!”

These small, consistent moments send a clear message: this is normal, this is safe, and you’re not alone in learning something new.

2. Potty Training Is a Skill—Not an Event

Let’s be real: we’d never expect our child to ride a bike without first letting them see it, touch it, and try it a few times with training wheels. Toileting is no different. It’s a complex skill that involves more than just sitting on a potty.

Using the toilet requires:

Body awareness (“I feel the urge to pee or poop.”)
Motor skills (pulling pants up/down, sitting steadily on a seat)
Communication (telling you they need to go or are wet)
Emotional regulation (staying calm, even after an accident)

These skills develop over time. When you allow your child to practice in low-stakes, no-pressure settings, they become more confident and more likely to succeed when potty training actually begins.

It’s okay if they “just sit” on the potty and nothing happens. Exposure alone helps.

3. Rushing Increases Resistance

If you’ve ever tried potty training cold turkey, you may have experienced the classic pushback:

“I don’t want to use the potty!”
“I’m scared of the toilet.”
“No! Diaper, please!”

This resistance isn’t because your child is being difficult. It’s because sudden changes to something as personal as elimination can be confusing and overwhelming.

Children thrive when they feel in control. When you start gradually, resistance tends to fade because they’ve had time to explore the idea without pressure.

Toddlers who’ve been able to:

Sit on the potty for fun
Watch siblings or parents model bathroom use
Read potty books or watch simple potty training videos
Help flush or wash hands

…tend to feel more confident and excited when the time comes to actually use the toilet.

Pro tip: Let them practice flushing even if they haven’t gone—just make it part of the rhythm!

4. It Gives You Time to Set Up for Success

Potty training doesn’t just involve your toddler—it’s a lifestyle shift for the whole household. When you start early, you give yourself time to prepare your home, your mindset, and your schedule in a way that supports your child.

Before you start, consider setting up:

A fully stocked bathroom (toddler potty, seat insert, stool, wipes, underwear, rewards)
A consistent language approach (what words will you use—pee, poop, potty, toilet?)
Time off or a low-pressure weekend where you can focus on practice
Calm, age-appropriate expectations for both you and your toddler

Parents need support, too. Whether it’s planning a slow start during vacation, creating a backup outfit bin in the car, or talking to your daycare about your family’s potty approach, starting early gives you time to prepare without scrambling.

5. Pre-Training Builds a Foundation for Faster Results

Here’s the paradox: the longer you prep, the quicker the actual training tends to go.

Why? Because you’re front-loading all the key teaching, modeling, and routine-building that otherwise has to happen under pressure once diapers are gone.

Toddlers who are well-prepared tend to:

Recognize potty cues earlier
Stay calm and cooperative during the process
Have fewer accidents
Need less prompting over time
Transition to independence faster

And most importantly? They’re proud of themselves. A child who feels confident in their body’s signals is more likely to take ownership of the process—which is the ultimate goal of potty training.

6. Your Toddler Deserves Support, Not Pressure

There’s so much pressure on parents to get potty training “done” quickly. From daycare deadlines to peer pressure at playgroups, the message often sounds like: if you haven’t trained by 2, you’re behind.

But this milestone isn’t about checking a box. It’s about helping your child grow with:

Confidence in their body
Clarity around expectations
Calm, supported guidance

When you begin potty training months in advance, you’re sending a powerful message:

“I trust you. I’m here to support you. And we’ll do this together.”

💡 So… When Should I Actually Start?

Most children show signs of readiness between 18 and 30 months, but that doesn’t mean you have to train fully during that window. Start prepping early, around 18 months, so the transition to toilet use doesn’t feel abrupt or scary.

Some readiness signs include:

Staying dry for longer stretches
Expressing interest in the bathroom
Wanting to wear underwear
Hiding to poop
Understanding basic instructions
Showing pride in “big kid” accomplishments

And if you don’t see these signs yet? No stress. Keep planting seeds!

🌱 What Pre-Training Can Look Like

Pre-training doesn’t require schedules or structure, t’s more like weaving potty awareness into everyday life. Here are simple ways to begin:

Narrate diaper changes: “Your diaper is wet. Someday soon, your pee will go in the potty!”
Read potty-themed books: Try Potty by Leslie Patricelli or Everyone Poops by Taro Gomi
Let them explore: Let your child sit on a potty seat or watch you go (if you’re comfortable!)
Practice transitions: “Let’s sit before bath.” Or: “Do you want to try before we leave the house?”
Celebrate curiosity: “You’re sitting on the potty! That’s a big kid thing to try.”

These little steps build comfort, familiarity, and trust, and over time, they add up to real progress.

👶 Need Help Getting Started? You're Not Alone.

Potty training doesn’t have to be chaotic or confusing. Whether you’re prepping early, already mid-process, or feeling like you’ve hit a wall, we’re here for you.

Many families benefit from having clear structure, personalized support, and realistic expectations. That’s why I offer both 1:1 coaching and an easy-to-follow course that empowers you to take the next steps at your own pace.

🌟 Our One-on-One Potty Training Support

If you want hands-on, customized help, I offer private 1:1 support to walk you through:

Pre-training strategies
Signs of readiness
Gentle, effective potty training methods
How to respond to resistance
Daycare transitions, nap/night training, and more

Together, we’ll create a plan that works for your toddler—not a cookie-cutter timeline.

🖥️ Or Go at Your Own Pace with Lullaby Potty

Not quite ready for coaching but want a clear plan? Lullaby Potty, our self-paced online course, is designed to help you confidently start potty prep months before “go time” and ease into full potty training with peace and purpose.

Inside, you’ll get: